Taking care of an elderly parent can be extremely rewarding,
but it also requires fortitude and determination.
The care starts off slowly...filling a prescription, doing a little laundry,
going food shopping for them or providing a ride to a doctor appointment.
Nowadays, people are living well into their 80's, and they can require a lot of help and care...
it can at times be daunting.
Hiring people to assist with some of the chores helps, but it can come with a feeling of
guilt on your part or resentment from your parent.
Parents can feel that their family should be taking care of them and doing everything that is required.
It is necessary for family members to be involved in certain things...
especially doctor appointments.
There is a lot of information available for caregivers on how to care for their elderly parents.
- Educate yourself about your parents medical condition -
- Include your parents when making decisions -
- Plan ahead -
- Keep a close eye on your parents well being -
- Inlist helpers early on -
- Maintain respect in your communications with your parent or parents -
- Get support -
- try to make this time in your lives rewarding -
I am adding a ps, not that it is really important, but we are taking care of both of our mothers,
hoping we are doing a good job.
13 comments:
Although we have lots of friends who do care for our elderly parents, neither Barb or I did. All of our parents passed away without needing any care. Our hope is that we are not a burden to our children but understand that is well out of our hands.
My mother in law died 2 years ago at age 97. We started taking care of her around her age 90, We did a lot right but also had some regrets that things we wish could have been different. I feel like I should create a manual for my kids. I'm in my 70's l
Both of our parents are gone and much to young.
Cathy
I could write a book on the challenges of care-giving!
fg...i know you could!! but i also think your wife is helping to take good care of you. my husband has been amazing when i have needed him most!!
I'll forward this to our kids. We count our blessings and I'm sure they do too with their fingers crossed. Hugs, Sallie (83 and counting).
As much as we love our parents, help is needed because we can become emotionally and physically drained. I think you and Chuck are amazing to do this for both your mothers. Both my parents were gone way too soon, within months of each other.
My husband’s mother is 91 and needs help but she is in Newfoundland, beyond our help on a daily basis. She was living here but moved back to be closer to friends. We hated to see her go but she was happier there. Now the friends are all gone and she is on her own in her condo relying on a few younger friends to help her. It makes us sad but she took it out of our hands.
Bless you for the care you provide for your mothers.
My mom will be 95 this year and she's struggling with memory loss. It's a constant adjustment for us. She does go to Day Care which she calls Senior Club twice a week and loves it. However, our lives have become very restricted since we don't feel comfortable leaving home for more than a couple hours at a time. Hiring caregivers in Hawaii is astronomical and she would really not like it. We are very lucky though because she is always in good humor and always tells us how grateful she is.
The fact that you are asking yourself if you are doing a good job probably means that you are.
Great post and good advice, both my parents and my hubby's parents have passed on years ago. I do not like the idea of becoming a burden to my son.
Take care, have a great day!
Many thanks for sharing this Debbie.
some very good advice here.
All the best Jan
My mom died at 72 and had Alheimers/Dementia since 62, my Dad took care of her, then my brother took care of my Dad and he died at 82, living so far away I could only help out when there was surgeries and I would go stay during the healing time but only for a couple weeks, so I never did know about taking care of my parents really for the long term, Greg's parents are both gone too and we didn't have to deal with them either, so all that is saying I know it is a lot of work but have never had to do it, I wish you all the best as you deal with all that comes your way.
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